Is that ........butt...... I smell??

I'm laying on the bed in a nightie, watching the Notebook on the laptop. The Husbinator comes tip-toeing through the bedroom door, hands behind his back. He reaches the bed right as Noah and Ally start a hot make out session on the screen. He gazes into my eyes and removes one hand from behind his back handing me a long stemmed red rose. As I smell the rose he closes the laptop and removes it from the bed. After crawling towards me he starts kissing his way down my
...
WAIT
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WAIT
...
WAIT
...
That's not what happened.

O yea now I remember (the sharpie sniffing must be messing with the memory squish in my brain)

I'm laying on the bed in a holey t-shirt and boxers watching the end of Never Back Down on the laptop. The husbinator comes barging in the bedroom complaining about some guy he was playing with on the PS3 network online. He flops on the bed right as guy1 starts beating the shit out of guy2 on the screen. We finish the movie. It was pretty good but then again we spend a least one Saturday a month at Buffalo Wild Wings watching UFC so what do you expect. The husbinator starts to get up and In true to me fashion I pounce. He taps out of the Rear naked choke I had him in (I know I was totally stoked to, Me: 5'2" him: 6'4" and I, read it IIIIII made him tap out.) so naturally now we were in the mood (don't be all judgey, you know you would be to) so hes kneeling over me and starts kissing my neck (TIME OUT: note to you perves reading this, We have a stand up tower fan that blows air at the foot of the bed, I like sub-Arctic temperatures when I sleep. O yea and were naked at this point) to hes kissing and nibbling and I'm giggling and then........I breath in right as a gust of fan air hits my beautiful little nostrils. Have you ever sat next to the dirty kid on the school bus? You know the one that smells like three day old butt, yea well.... So the smell goes away and I'm thinking my nose is just fucking with me when I get assaulted by another hit of assey badness. It doesn't go away. I giggle like a dolt and then blurt out :

Me: Ummm, do you smell butt?
Husbinator: *looks startled and then leans down and sniffs* Oh Gawd! *bolts to the bathroom and I hear the shower running*

We so totally did it after his shower. I will not be deterred by a smell (If it can be fixed)

Anyway Yesterday (The day after the butt smell incident) I was sitting at my desk and I kept smelling something fun-ky but I couldn't find the culprit, so I got to thinking about the night before and to be honest I was a little perturbed.

After a ten minute think about the gross husbinator, a co-worker comes up and goes "hmmm, it smelled like feet in here for a minute, but now its gone." and he walked of.

As soon as he was gone, I slithered under my desk and popped off a shoesie. Sure enough It smelled like a week old skinned cat was living in my heels. I shoved my shoes into the darkest deepest corner of my office and went commando feet the rest of the day.

So kiddies moral of the story: Well I really don't have one, maybe its we all stink, or perhaps its don't make fun of others. Actually I think its wash your dirty ass and make sure your heels don't stink before leaving the house.

~*~ Toodles ~*~






Feet Smell